Music's equation

Mathematics is the key to the universe.

Music = Mathematics

Wisdom from Above

“Are any of you wise or sensible? Then show it by living right and by being humble and wise in everything you do. But if your heart is full of bitter jealousy and selfishness, don’t brag or lie to cover up the truth. That kind of wisdom doesn’t come from above. It is earthly and selfish and comes from the devil himself. Whenever people are jealous or selfish, they cause trouble and do all sorts of cruel things. But the wisdom that comes from above leads us to be pure, friendly, gentle, sensible, kind, helpful, genuine, and sincere. When peacemakers plant seeds of peace, they will harvest justice.”

James 3: 13-18

I thank God every day for the spiritual nourishment that He provides through the Holy Bible. He is my breath of fresh air. It seems that whatever is bothering me at any given time and I open up my Bible the passage that I open to usually pertains to my problem. We as a society are coming up on some serious times and only faith in God will give us the strength we need to endure and make it through. The passage above is very uplifting to me and gives me reassurance that being humble and putting God’s work first is the path I need to stay on.

Slippin'

Don't let this video fall on deaf ears! This is one of my favorite songs of all-time. DMX captures oppression, depression, and struggle better than most. I can relate, in many ways I can feel his pain. DMX, I must say, is a misunderstood man beyond most people's comprehension. How can we as a society judge men like DMX and cast stones without even knowing or understanding what he is about? Under the video are the lyrics to this song. Please, follow along and try to understand what is being said here. Not only that, but how would you feel if your father left you at age seven, your mother didn't care about you enough to take care of you, and bouncing from group home to group home was your childhood routine? When nobody cares about you you feel hopeless and alone. He is a human being that was treated like a beast, left unattended, and to fend for himself as a child. What type of man do you think he will grow up to be? Maybe, he didn't make the right choices growing up, but who was there to correct him or help him along the way. In this video, I see hope and conviction. I see a man who knows right from wrong, chose wrong to fend for himself, and now wants change to be there for his own children and to help others.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha uhh

See to live is to suffer but to survive

well that's to find meaning in the suffering.

[Chorus]

Ay yo I'm slippin' I'm fallin' I can't get up

Ay yo I'm slippin' I'm fallin' I can't get up

Ay yo I'm slippin' I'm fallin' I gots to get up

Get me back on my feet so I can tear shit up!

[Repeat]

[1]

I been through mad different phases like Masons

to find my way & now I know that happy days are not far away

If I'm strong enough I'll live long enough to see my kids

doing something more constructive with they time

than bids I know because I been there

now I'm in there sit back & look

at what it took for me to get there

First came the bullshit the drama with my mama

she got on the fly shit until i split

and said that I'ma be that seed

that doesn't need much to succeed

strapped with mad greed and a heart that doesn't bleed

I'm ready for the world or at least I thought I was

baggin' niggas when I caught a buzz

for thinking about how short I was

Going too fast it wouldn't last but yo I couldn't tell

group homes & institutions, prepare my ass for jail

They put me in a situation forcin' me to be a man

when I was just learnin' to stand without a helpin' hand

Damn, was it my fault, somethin' I did

to make a father leave his first kid at 7 doin' my first bid?

Back on the scene at 14 with a scheme

to get more cream than I'd ever seen in a dream

and by all means I will be living high off the hog

and I never gave a fuck about much but my dog

That's my only motherfucka I had offered my last

Just another little nigga headed nowhere fast

[Chorus]

[2]

That ain't the half shit get's worse as I get older

actions become bolder heart got colder

chip on my shoulder that I dared a nigga to touch

didn't need a click cause I scared a nigga that much

One deep went to for kicks

catchin' vicks throwin' bricks gettin by bein' slick

used to get high to get by used to have to puff my L

in the morning before I get fly

I ate something a couple of forties made me hate somethin'

I did some coke now I'm ready to take something

3 years later showing signs of stress

didn't keep my hair cut or give a fuck how I dressed

I'm possessed by the darker side livin' the cruddy life

Shit like this kept a nigga with a bloody knife

wanna make records but I'm fucking it up

I'm slippin' I'm fallin' I can't get up

[Chorus]

[3]

Wasn't long before I hit rock bottom

Niggas talking shit like damn look how that rock got him

Open like a window no more Indo look at a video

sayin' to myself that could've been yo on the TV

believe me it could be done somethin's got to give

it's got to change cause I've got a son

I've got to do the right thing for shorty

and that means no more getting high drinking forties

So I get back lookin' type slick again

Fake niggas jump back on my dick again

Nothin' but love for those that know how it feel

& much respect to all my niggas that kept it real

Kept a nigga strong kept a nigga from doin wrong

Niggas know who they is and this is yo fuckin' song

and to my boo who stuck with a nigga through

all the bullshit you'll get yours because it's due

[Chorus]

can't get up...I gots to get up

This is from the heart baby, don't get it twisted

Ahh X RATED!!!!!

Letter to Leaders

“I’ve commanded you to be strong and brave. Don’t ever be afraid or discouraged! I am the Lord your God, and I will be there to help you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9



This scripture was from the beginning of the Book of Joshua. Moses had just passed on and Israel was without leadership. God spoke to Joshua and told him to not be afraid and to lead his nation. So many men I come across today that “want” to be leaders and have the most exalted seats of power, yet with all the wrong intentions, fail miserably. When leading God’s people there is no room for ego, exaltation, and/or pride. God is the one to be exalted. God is the one to be praised and honored. Not man. Any man who does not put God first and his works will never see a day of true happiness or have the respect of the men he’s trying to lead. Joshua had love and respect for God and God knew that. Joshua’s intentions were only for him to be used as an instrument of God and that is why Joshua led his people in victory of the Promised Land.

In this land of “milk and honey” we too can have our share of true happiness and God’s blessing as long as our fraternal, spiritual, and religious leaders in Christ show us the right way through their example and pure heart.

Carl Thomas-Summer Rain

I love music like this. Carl Thomas has a great voice and this video is one of the most romantic videos in recent years.

nucleus

Faces

I’m a son to my mother
A father to my daughter
A child to my God
A follower to my Lord
A leader to his followers
I am a creation that creates
A gift that gives
A soul that soars through the wind
I am but one man
That has many faces
Trials and tribulations
Of the everyday
Led to the fantasies
Of false realities
Now, I am given the sight to see
What is in store for me
Reality is, He will lead me
My spirit explores the word of He
So that I may spread the Eternal Entity that Be
To the hearts that can not see
To spin agony into harmony
To turn saddened souls back to G O D
Let us bond in faith
And look upon the face of the one that is of grace

D. Thomas
2/20/01

History Repeats

"The Lord must be furious with me and everyone else in Israel and Judah, because our ancestors did not obey the laws written in this book. Go find out what the Lord wants us to do."

2 Chronicles 34: 21

Third Eye

I disect
The dialect
Communication
Keeps the nation
In hallucination

Bloodlines monopolize
While another set of blood ties
Are on the uprise
Generations
Are hypnotized

They both devils in disguise
Think I don’t read between the lines?
They think I don’t see the lies
They act like friends
Really are foes
Talk behind my back
Think I don’t know

But I’m coming back
Like Return of the Jedi
A Knight of Christ
Wise, with a third eye
Strength and might, that of a samurai
Jesus trains me as a magi

Knights, rise up!

D. Thomas
2/11/07

Family Portrait

My seven year old daughter drew this at school the day before my son was born. Now, the thing is, we didn't know if we were having a boy or girl. Isabella, my seven year old, somehow knew it was going to be a boy. This picture is of Isabella holding her new born baby brother, Juney, and her little sister Catherine. It's moments like this that make life beautiful. She's not a bad artist either, I might add. I couldn't draw this good at seven years old.

Life is Good!

She Cries

Confused are her ways
Touch is all she needs
Love is all she desires
Alone she is
Her mind on fire
Torment set in
She sits and talks with herself
For no one else listens
Her soul is screaming
Pleading to be heard
But the voice of, blows in the wind
Falls on deaf ears
All she wants is love
Someone to care for her
Where is my knight
She asks
But shining armor turns to rust
As years pass
Her voice fades
Her soul cries

D. Thomas
2/2/07

Reading from Jeremiah

A reading from the Book of the Prophet Jeremiah

The word of the Lord came to me, saying:
Before I formed you in the womb
I knew you,
before you were born I dedicated you,
a prophet to the nations
I appointed you.
But do you gird your loins;
stand up and tell them
all that I command you.
Be not crushed on their account,
as though I would leave you crushed
before them;
for it is I this day
who have made you a fortified city,
a pillar of iron, a wall of brass,
against the whole land:
against Judah’s kings and princes,
against its priests and people.
They will fight against you but not
prevail over you,
for I am with you to deliver you,
says the Lord.

The word of the Lord. Thanks be to God.


Powerful! God is good and He is with us. This passage was from Sunday’s mass service. These bold and encouraging words are needed today as they were over two thousand years ago. We face a new evil today that our ancestors faced then. However, if we keep God in our hearts and Jesus in our souls then we will be protected. We must rise up against the new threat of the beast.

Today, is a new day, we have adapted new ways. Our old ways have phased. Our new ways are similar to the black plague, in an emotional state. I’m physically and spiritually ready for revolution; and mentally and emotionally ready for evolution. The sixties was a time of peace and love, which was a great movement. However, it was only the majority of one race and minimal of another whom lived it. Uncle Sam wasn’t too thrilled either. So the hate mixed in collapsed the movement. Now, forty years later, the new movement is of hate, which all races tend to side with. Uncle Sam, in many ways, can’t control this level of power without claiming martial law. Mental and spiritual anarchy is on the rise. Too many fatherless children run the streets; too many single mothers feel the beat. The beast seems to have been released from his heat. Prison cell in hell is where he dwelled. The hate in the world gave him right to unify his army in the night. Time to sweep the street and recruit his peeps. Harvest time is near. The sickle is being sharpened and prepared. I understand that the time is at hand. The Son of Man will grace our land. White robes will be handed out. Get yours and know without doubt, that you have been blessed by God. For everyone else will be judged hard. The war of Him vs. he will go down as the battle of battles so let’s pray for mercy.

Prison Philosophy

Determination

Dedication

Dicipline

Conquer

That was my prison philosophy. Locked up at the age of 20, all I did was read, think, politic, and work out. Kept it simple. But kept it moving. Seems that 10 years later, once again oppression set in. This time in a different setting but same form of struggle. Therefore, I must bring it back to basics and keep it simple. Determination. Dedication. Dicipline. Conquer. Those bold, yet simple words kept me motivated and focused. Time to go back to work & see what I am made of.

Eating Without Washing Your Hands

Jesus then said:
“Don’t any of you know what I am talking about by now? Don’t you know that the food you put into your mouth goes into your stomach and then out of your body? But the words that come out of your mouth come from your heart. And they are what make you unfit to worship God. Out of your heart come evil thoughts, murder, unfaithfulness in marriage, vulgar deeds, stealing, telling lies, and insulting others. These are what make you unclean. Eating without washing your hands will not make you unfit to worship God.”

That passage is from Matthew 15: 16-20 (the entire story is v. 10-20). I sit and laugh to myself, for, I think of all the people I come across in life and how this pertains to each and everyone of us, myself included (I’m no angel and I know it). We all look at others and tell them what makes them unacceptable to God and why they don’t have the right to worship Him, then we turn around and insult people, do things that are not ethical in business, steal, and tell lies.

I mean some of us believe that white lies are harmless and not bad, but isn’t a “little white lie” still a lie. We should sit back and really analyze our position in life. If we claim to love God and worship God then shouldn’t we take into account that the small things in life like: not taking communion on a regular basis or not going to confession is small potatoes compared to the people that do make communion every week, but are shady in their business practices or lie and gossip about others.

How can we look at people straight in the face and be “nicey, nice” to them but once their back is turned we talk mean things of them and insult them, but yet we claim to worship God and that we are good. How can we claim to be “good” when the words that come out of our mouths are so bad, evil, malicious, and insulting?

So in essence, “Eating without washing your hands will not make you unfit to worship God,” but the bad words that come out of your mouth are what make you unclean and unfit. Let’s put an end to the gossip. Let’s put an end to the lying and stealing. Let’s cleanse our hearts and souls and think positive and feel good. Then the words that come out of our mouths will reflect our love for God.

UFO_over_O_Hare

If you listen to last few seconds of this video you will hear somebody in the back round saying "It would have landed, but..." I would have liked to hear what came after "but..." Wouldn't you?

Tales of a Chatroom

She walks into the room
Only seen with the mind
She elaborates on dreams
That only are in disguise
She asks for a favor
Or maybe a key
To the door of her soul
That is trapped inside thee
She knows nothing of guilt
But lies in her sleep
She takes a trip
Down that road in a heap
She runs out of gas
Only to awake
That only she rides in
A room that has been forsaked
By souls of torment
And tragedy and grief
They all have something in common
But at that sound, they shriek

D. Thomas
1/07

Boys & Girls Club, is it necessary?

My personal quote is, “What’s Your Purpose?” How I came to that I will explain in a few minutes (and give in greater detail in another entry). What I’m about to say will put me on the spot (challenge me more than anything). For about a year I have plotted the idea of a “Youth & Parent Development Center.”

Actually, I had the thought for about ten years to do something for the children, whether it be a recreation center or some sort of club and after the last year of really just “thinking” and not doing I came across the book by Denzel Washington: A Hand to Guide Me. That book helped me regain momentum and focus on why I wanted to start this center in the first place.

I didn’t have a Boys Club growing up. And now reflecting on that, I wish I did. I think a club of that nature would have helped me growing up and maybe even sway some of my bad decisions. But I didn’t have that, and I won’t cry over spilt milk. However, the situation remains the same. There are still no clubs in my area for the youth of today. Though, there are the streets. There are the drugs. The same activities I was exposed to as a teenager.

Are these the activities that we want our children of today to be exposed to? Why now, you may ask? Well, don’t you think it’s about time? The world today is in a serious state of hurt. Our children have (in my part of CT that is) really no place to go, but the streets to run off steam, at least with no cost. There are but a few role-models and fathers involved in the lives of our children. So, there is no guidance, no leadership, and no sense of self worth or motivation to do good.

I see all too often that the grandparents are raising the children with the mother. Where are the fathers? Where are the role models, the mentors? If you do exist please, come forward and let me know. I would like to shake your hand. Please, by no means am I here talking down on anyone. Everyone has their own story.

All too often I here, “Well, it’s not my problem.” Or, “That child is not mine, why should I raise it?” Then, who will? You may be right. It may not be your child, but doesn’t that child still deserve a man or mentor in his or her life to grow, to learn from. That child did not ask to be born, but it was born. So now what? What do we do? Just continue with our own lives and push that child to the side with no guidance or mentoring.

I know we all have our own problems, believe me, I have my share. But I can not stand here and let another child grow up the way I did. It’s not right; it’s not fair, to that child or society. Yes, I said “it’s not right to society.” Believe it or not, we are all affected by this common problem across the world (I’ll make this a topic of another entry), especially “society.”

So now what, where do we go from here? I am open to ideas. Feel free to contact me via e-mail (click on view my complete profile, then click e-mail where it says contact) or post a comment and let me know what you think may help or if you just want to comment. I believe one of the first steps is to stop pointing fingers and find solutions. We won’t find solutions if we are too busy pointing fingers and placing blame. A lot of times the fathers and mothers don’t get along for whatever reasons and hold grudges and the children are affected. Let’s stop this nonsense, we are only hurting the children (this will be another topic posted at another time, the children is what I want focused on for now). The boy scouts was really never my cup of tea. But we could use some sort of brotherhood like environment for the boys and girls to bond. I have a few ideas for children’s groups or clubs that I’m working on as we speak.

The center I spoke of earlier to me is the most important thing in my opinion for now to work on. I am in early stages of creating the center and would like all the support I can get. Not only is it going to be a recreation center but a development center too. As a proud parent myself, I understand that I don’t always have the answers so their will be something for the parents as well.

If any of you out there reading this is a single parent, a grandparent helping to raise a child, a father that understands, or a man or woman that would like to help. Anybody, please, send me your support in anyway possible; whether it is through funding, advice, direction, and/or encouragement. Like I said earlier, I welcome all.

For anybody out there that may feel that I am not “qualified” or that I shouldn’t be the one to do this. Who will then, you? If so, please do so, if you are better qualified I would be glad to get out of your way as long as it gets done and the children no longer are “without.”

I think at times we all wander through parts of our life and wonder what are we going to do or what direction to take. Sometimes we all need to sit back and reflect on what is important to us in life and how do we get there. “What’s Your Purpose?” Well, I ask everybody to ask themselves that question. I think I may have found mine.

Perseverance through Persecution

Father, you are just and merciful
Thank you for punishing my radical behavior
I need cleansing
My soul is tainted from the ways of the world
I seek your wisdom
For guidance and grace
Fallen I have every now and then
Please Father, I need you, pick me up again
Show me how to walk for you
I patiently wait your instruction
Whatever your will is for me, so be it
You know my needs though
And time is ticking
I know you will take care of me
You always have in my time of need
I have been humbled once again Father
Why do the people that claim to love you
And have faith in you persecute me
You gave me mercy, yet they judge me
Your Son says that I am forgiven
Why then do they not forgive
Much like the Pharisees and Sadducees
Of yesteryear
A new group of those old ways have re-appeared
They cloak themselves with your cloth
And act as if they are “holier than thou”
Like they can do no wrong
Greeting the “accomplished”
But looking down on the “others”
Am I just being bitter Lord
Or is the time at hand

D. Thomas
1/07

"A Hand To Guide Me" book review

“A Hand to Guide Me,” all I can say is, “where was this book ten years ago, better yet, fifteen years ago? This book is surely a treasure for those that are in need of role models and for those wanting to be role models (And my guess is, that’s pretty much everybody on this planet). Denzel’s story in my opinion was the most inspiring; however, there were many great inspiring lives that you can choose from in this book to debate that. I personally recommend this book to anybody that knows how to read. When my seven year old learns how to read better I will pass this book on to her.

There were a few people in here that didn’t really tell how a mentor was their guide in life and helped them to succeed, which at first I thought was dumb and one or two more that just seemed to me like they were just bitter and/or pointless. But as I thought about it more, I realized that maybe they were examples of how you might still succeed without mentoring but it just would take a lot more work on your behalf; or, that they were examples to really prove that every child growing up really does need positive influences in their life.

My favorite and most inspiring tales told in this book came from(other than from Denzel of course): Walter Anderson, John Antioco, Chick Big Crow, Gen. Wesley Clark, Phil Jackson, Donna Richardson Joyner, Patrick J. Kelly, Rev. Edward A. Malloy, Joe Morgan, Matthew F. Pottinger, Gen. Colin Powell, Ahmad Rashad, John Shuerholz, Bernard Shaw, George M. Steinbrenner III, & John Wooden.

Not all of those names are household names, but they are all successful and had something profound to say and/or a good story to tell. There were famous and well known people such as: Hank Aaron, Mohammed Ali, Debbie Allen, Yogi Berra, Johnny Damon, John Mellencamp, Leonard Nimoy, Swin Cash, and Bill Clinton, just to name a few. Everyone who reads this book will have a different perspective on some of these stories but in the end I believe that we will all share the same belief that this book is a Godsend.

I challenge everyone to pick this book up and disagree with me. I doubt anybody will have a solid argument that this book was not needed. I welcome all comments, positive and negative on this book. But if you are going to have a negative comment please read the book in its entirety first and justify your words.

Pharisees roam cloaked

Pharisees and Sadducees roam the earth once again. They cloak themselves with the cloth of Christ, yet they judge and condemn others like we were a plague. Even the older parishioners seem to judge and look down on others as if to say they are sinless.

However, aren’t we all sinners in the eyes of God, do we not all share in His mercy if we repent and have faith in Jesus? I know, and believe me; I do know that I am far from being a saint. However, Jesus knows my soul. Jesus knows my love for Him. He knows my soul to have a faith in Him that is uncompromising. He is embedded in my life. I do make mistakes at times; I will never pretend or put on the façade of being someone without doing wrong. But, isn’t that the reason why Jesus was sent to earth? Was He not sent to this planet to redeem our sins and wrong doings? And isn’t it our church leaders to give us that gentle nudge and guide us in the right direction when we do wrong?

At times, I feel like instead of that spiritual guidance that we need, our church officials and elders look down on us, push us aside, and judge us. It almost seems that their hearts have hardened through the years. And by no means am I saying all our leaders and elders are like this. Because I personally know many that are good and honestly do God’s work. Just a few are like that. But that select few is what sways our youth away from the church. It is that select few that tarnishes the reputation of our existence. Then again, I do not know their life story to why they seem or act this way. So with that being said, I will pray for them to loosen their work load of a hardened heart.

Our younger parents and youth need positive guidance, help, and role models. They need the love of God in their lives. They need the mentoring of wise elders of faith. Where are the men to do this? Where are the men of compassion, strength, and mercy? Instead of being hard and walking away from us sinners, show us love and guidance. Teach us the way!

However, I must say, my parish recently was blessed with a new full time priest. I believe he is genuine and will do our people justice. He reminds me of an old soul that I miss very much that was genuine, sincere, compassionate, and most of all helping others turn back to God. I would like anybody who reads this entry to pray for my parish’s new pastor to guide us proper and revive our parish to what it once was, people uniting in Christ and full of life.